Salam,
Have you ever thought so randomly, how much our words could affect others? Last night I gave a thought about that because I was hurt by someone's words. I have always known that I do have quite a sensitive hurt and sometimes I don't get rough rude jokes. People would sometimes think that I'm such a sissy because I would get hurt over petty things that they have said so I learnt to put on a poker face and be as equally rude as them. As time passes by I thought as long as I do these two things I'd be fine and things will pass by. But there are some moments where it is so ridiculous on how rude people can be with their words. Rude doesn't imply only for talking in such a disgraceful manner or tone, rude by right as for me does imply to the meaning of your words which intends to downgrade another person in a very disgraceful manner.
I get it that it was merely a joke but that kind of joke did not need to be said countless time, repetitively and may I say, with harsh words.
"She looked awfully horrible in candid pictures, so you should have taken candid pictures of her"
"Dian, do you know that you look ugly in candid pictures. Like really ugly, ugly super ugly"
Yes, you can say " You were just being insecure, she was just joking." But then, I never post their ugly pictures and tried so hard to not take ugly pictures of my friends, even though I looked good in those pictures and they don't. People would say " Her personality is like that, straight-forward and honest." I never asked people to lie if I look ugly, I admitted to that, to any ugly pictures of me and neither do I will shove harsh words into others' thought about themselves. Really UGLY? What is more awful is that when that person is actually your friend and literally saying it out loud in front of others. Emphasizing on the matter of being UGLY.
I am no model or even a beauty queen so I would definitely have flaws. Flaws that at times I dislike, so I will try to hide it , flaws that I know others would hate it too. The kind of flaws that I know is very rude to label to others. You see, the point doesn't lie as to why I got hurt being called ugly because I do have my ugly moments. It is actually because I was mocked and the whole scene, words and action are downgrading me, I felt as if I am a criminal and my fault has to be pinpointed really well. Humiliating, really. And those are not kind words. But it made me think of my previous reactions that I've learnt to adapt to this situation. I became equally rude like these kind of people. In the end,I was just the same person who would hurt others with words and I might have actually hurt someone else in the past. I feel so bad knowing how painful is that, so I really hope I can change that.
Shhh
